| The Basics |
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| Tuesday, 09 September 2008 01:47 |
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I learned to give head in a very incremental way; for me, it was a process of learning one small simple aspect of the whole to the point where I could do it without paying attention - acquiring a muscle-memory -- and then going on to the next. I'll explain it the same way; I encourage guys who may be reading this to be patient and encouraging with women who are learning, and women to be patient with themselves. From the basics to the advanced moves: BASICS: 1. Get it wet-- The opening move: start by getting his dick nice and wet. First work up some spit, then slide your mouth over the head of his dick and drool on it; take it out of your mouth and give it some wet sloppy mouthing up and down the full length on both sides. For style points you can do this with a head-tilt and an upward-pointed smile, but strictly speaking it's purely technical: you want that dick slick and spit-lubed for the moves to follow. During the course of the BJ, continue to drool on his dick. 2. No teeth -- It goes without saying that teeth are bad. The general wisdom is that the way to avoid this is to cover your teeth with your lips (i.e. fold your lips over your teeth completely, like you're making a granny-with-dentures-face), which isn't really viable: any one-shot cocksucker can tell you that this will prevent you from forming a seal around the dick in your mouth, and is somewhat uncomfortable to boot. What you actually want is to have your lips tensed, not unlike how you would tense them to blow a kiss: when you open your mouth, this will keep them closed in well past where your teeth begin. If you're confused about what I mean, try the following: First, hold a pencil up in front of your face. Then, pick up the pencil with your mouth using only your lips - no teeth. Your lips should be in roughly the correct configuration, tensed and extended. Add suction to that, and they will effectively cover your teeth while giving head. 3. The basic move-- This isn't a proper blowjob on its own, but it's the foundation of a BJ. If you're just trying this for the first time, it may be easiest if you hold onto his penis at the base and rest your free hand against a steady surface such as the edge of the bed or a wall. This is how you coordinate the movement of your lips and your tongue, which is what's really important: Lips puckered, form a seal over the very end of his penis with your tongue resting against the tip. Then, simultaneously slide the your lips and the tensed tip of your tongue forward along him until your tongue-tip is a little past the frenulum, which is the sensitive area on the underside of the dick where the shaft joins the head. Once you're past the frenulum, stop and slide your lips (and tensed tongue-tip) back until your lips are again pursed around the tip, tongue resting against it. The trick to coordinating your tongue and your lips in this is the rhythm of it: lips forward, tongue-tip forward. lips back, tongue-tip back. The fact that everything's moving in the same direction makes it possible to do several things simultaneously. Do this until it feels totally natural and easy. 4. The basic move, redux-- Once the basic move feels easy and natural, you can turn it into a competent if not particularly flashy blowjob with the addition of just one more movement: Instead of simply holding him at the base with your hand, close your hand around his cock just forward of where your lips rest when you start. As you slide your mouth and tongue down over the head of his cock, slide your closed fingers forward all the way to the base; as you slide your mouth and tongue back up to the tip, slide your closed fingers back up also until they are again just forward of your lips. Just as the rhythm when coordinating your lips and tongue was lips-forward/tongue-forward, lips-back/tongue-back, the rhythm you acquire now should be mouth-forward/hand-forward, mouth-back/hand-back. You want to time this so that his dick gets as deep as it's going in your mouth at the same time your hand hits the base of his shaft, and your tongue is at the tip of his dick when your hand meets your lips. This is where it becomes important that you keep him nice and wet. Once you can pull this off, you're competently giving head! Congratulations. :D This seems complicated, but faster than you can say "That was awesome," it'll become familiar to the point that you can add variations and pay attention to other things as well. It only gets more fun from here. 5. Functional flare: once you have the basic move redux down, the simplest and most functional way to take it up a notch is to cradle his balls as you suck and stroke. This can be a useful indication of when he's going to come, as described below: BASIC LEVEL TRICKS AND TIPS: * How to know when he's getting close: As your man gets closer to climax, his body will clue you in to what's coming; in most cases he'll start to ooze precum, and his balls will tighten up closer to his body. If you are cradling his balls you'll be able to feel this happen, which can be useful as a cue to adjust your speed. When he's actually going to come, it's common courtesy for him to tell you: I've never had a guy not, that I can remember. Some men, wonderful beautiful darling men, also make noises that indicate how they are reacting to what you're doing or express their verbal appreciation. Pay attention to his breath rate, and any noises he makes. * Speed -- While timing is more of an art than a science, my experience with BJ speed runs something like this: once you have movements of the basic BJ down, going at a comfortable/natural speed is sufficient to get him most of the way to orgasm. When you sense that he's approaching, you'll want to speed up to a less comfortable pace - but you probably won't have to go fast for long. If you're totally baffled about timing, you can ask him to guide you. * If you're just starting out, there's no need to try to go deep. The most sensitive part of the penis is the frenulum, which is where the corona (flared, fleshy edge of the head) joins the shaft on the bottom of the penis. Most of your attention (and virtually all of your tongue-focus, except anything you're doing to be visually interesting) should be focused on this spot when you're just starting out. A feeling of penetration is of secondary (but significant!) importance, but can be much more easily achieved by using your hand to stroke as you suck. * Positioning: The most comfortable place for me to give head, personally, is on my knees on a carpeted (or blanket-draped) floor. Some women prefer to crouch over their man while he's in a prone position; do whatever is most comfortable to you. I've always kind of wanted to blow a standing man, but somehow none have been able to keep their knees locked to completion; I don't know if this is a testament to my cocksucking ability or proof positive that Hollywood sold me a lie. * Beginner-level flare: the simplest way to add flare to the basic bj is to stimulate more of his senses; for example, moan around his dick. Men are very visually keyed: smiling up at him with his cock in your mouth (he'll be able to see the smile at the corners of your eyes and mouth) is the simplest example of this. You can also take his dick out of your mouth and rub it against your cheeks and mouth, or lick it like an ice-cream cone while you look up at him. * Warning! Arguably the most annoying thing about giving head is having your hair get in the way and/or in your mouth. You may want to pull it back first, or have him hold it back for you. Some boys are better at this than others. |
Comments (4)
Thank you so much
very nice